A long week already

First, I've been a little sick, so that's put me off-kilter before the work week even started. And even taking Nyquil at 8pm leaves me groggy at 6am the next day. So much for my cutting back on caffeine.....

Then, Annoying Part-Time Guy managed to do $3000's worth of damage to one of the mowers last Thurs, and he's spent this week railing against the management because It Wasn't His Fault, It was Just An Accident. Annoying Part-Time Guy has been pulled off of all the equipment this week, and probaby next week too, which is a great inconvenience to the rest of us. We either have to drive him around so he can do things, or make up stuff for him to do, all the while sitting watch over the key box. Grrrrrr.

I'm a couple of evening's knitting away from being done on the afghan for Stan; if I can manage an evening where I stay awake later than 8:30, I might even finish it in one. None too soon, either--Nathan told me this week that they're making arrangements for hospice to come in and check on him daily--final arrangements, pain meds, and quality-of-life things. If I can get it done by Monday, Nathan said he's going over to do yard work for Stan, and he'd deliver it for me.

And, to top it all off, our friends X, Y, and Q are still showering us with drama. X and Y are still trying to do counselling, individually and as a couple, but it's not going well from what we hear. X still doesn't feel as though sie has heard the whole truth yet from Y; Y is in this self-pitying defensive mode that frankly drives me nuts. I've not talked to Y since Sat night, and I really don't feel like sie was listening at all for most of it, because it just wasn't what sie wanted to hear. X is on a voyage of discovery, trying to find out exactly what was going on between Y and Q, and getting (justifiably so) more upset every time sie uncovers another lie.

I just don't know what to do for them. I still strongly like all involved. But I've lost patience with Y, and the more I hear about how he lied to X, and to us, and to Q to a certain extent, the less respect I have for him.

Mulling something over

sidhe612 made an interesting comment last time we talked on the phone; it's been floating in my head since, trying to crystallize. Let's see if this gets anywhere close.

A lot of our friends are poly, in one form or another. A certain group of our friends were beginning to explore poly, and it developed into a very long, messy crisis. sidhe612 suggested that perhaps part of the crisis came from the examples of poly practices he had noticed within our community. This made me think about choices By & I had made, and how they might look from outside our head space.

For instance, at Laid-Back Labor Day, 2002, I had a fling with one of the guys in our camp, and By took advantage of the time to enjoy one of our female friends. We both knew about the arrangements ahead of time, no big deal to us, much fun was had by all. And again, at the same event this year, By spent some quality time with friends of ours who'd made a long trip to see us, and I'd picked up a new "pet".

Now, of these four connections, only the one with Pet was a spur-of-the-moment, he's-cute-why-not sort of thing; and I've made an effort to build more of a connection with Pet since (hence my head cold this week). But I can see where the others, if you didn't pay attention to time we spent with the various people beforehand, could look like sport-fucking. (Yes, for the record, the first night with Pet was sport. )

So now, I'm wondering if we should change our behavior so our intent is more clear. Not just because of our friend who's having the crisis, but I wonder if others in our community are seeing the same things in our behaviors.


Something else our friend in the crisis hasn't seemed to catch is the concept of boundaries and permission. He's looked at both as control issues, and seems to me to be very defensive about them. He didn't notice, before my sport with Pet took place, that first I talked to Byron, then Pet talked to Byron--in public, in front of the whole camp. I've been told others in camp noticed, and applauded Pet's manners. But our friend doesn't seem to have caught the lesson that a few simple questions, and honest answers, can keep feelings from being hurt.

Guess I need to think some more.

Happy me

The Other Dave is hiding in the computer lab finishing an assignment that's due tonight, our boss is out "sick", his boss is on vacation, and his boss just left on vacation this morning (that's Cheese, Bigger Cheese, and Super Cheese, for those who were following the Nemesis saga). This leaves Yours Truly to watch the shop and hand out keys. All afternoon.

Can't think of a better way to spend a Friday afternoon at work.

Drama for everyone

I have been asked by one of the participants to make my locked posts on the ongoing saga available publicly. While I can see that person's viewpoint, at least one other participant is not comfortable with that level of publicity, so I will further posts public, names disguised. Past posts I will send to the person who asked for them.

( Now that that's settled... )

Could someone please explain to me

why guys tend to leave the caps off of pens? All the guys I work with do it, even By does it now and then. Is it a phallic thing I'm missing or something?

mood: confused

(no subject)

Bad thought: was stitching a 3" temari ball, and realized that, as large and impressive as the 5" long needle is, I have (and have used!) finer gauge knitting needles.

*giggle*

I think it's time for bed now. The Nyquil is kicking in, and I'm getting silly.